Writing, styles and typos [in my writing]

Writing

Evil Cold Gremlins are starting to pack up their bags and leave me be. Going doesn't mean gone, and I still don't feel amazing, but I feel distinctly better than the last few days.

Styles

Which means I've written! I've read a lot of books. I'm tackling one wip which has 10 chapters already written. However, I'm editing now because those chapters are in 3rd person. New pov for this book is 1st person.

In truth the first chapter has undergone the transformation to 1st person but the style of voice needed changing.

In doing this, I am writing new material in the first 10 chapters. One paragraph in particular had me a little stumped this afternoon. It was the kind of paragraph I would normally write. But it didn't feel right. It wasn't dynamic enough. It had the evil (gasp!) was in it.

I am not a grammar girl. I mean, I can write coherent sentences (some of the time). I can (usually) get my meaning out to the world. But it can take me time to get there. I know using was is okay some of the time. But I know I use it too much (thank you beta reader!).

So I took the two sentences and asked some fellow writers their opinion on it.

The second, revised version was better! Yay! I may not be able to tell you the technical side of why the first one was incorrect (Pssst, did you see that? A was!!!), but I go by writer's instinct. Or more like Muse instinct. Which isn't all that solid, but she's improving. Slowly.

The funny typo? Features instead of feathers. Feathers are features, but I really needed feathers in this instance..